Vegans and the Incredible Shrinking Brain

You would think this is the stuff of Alice and Wonderland, where one pill makes you taller and the other makes you small.   But according to a new study out of the esteemed Oxford University claims that being a strict vegetarian can make your brain shrink.    That’s right, vegans are six times more likely to suffer brain shrinkage than, gasp, meat eaters.  Of course, the study also claimed that drinking more than 14 drinks a week will also make your brain shrink, as will smoking pot or being overweight.   Interesting study.

I have often wondered why people working in health food stores can act like morons.   Witness the one the other day who asked to eat half a chicken and salad if I would need a knife and fork.   “No, chopsticks,” I told her,somewhat sarcastically.  So she gave me chopsticks. Therefore, I would take the study further and posit that eating veggies also reduces greatly one’s sense of humor.   But that is my own individual perception.  But many will agree.  Maybe not the vegans, but all the others who derive their culinary pleasures by feasting on the flatulent, ozone tampering animal hordes that graze our depleted lands.   Think of how many times you have been reminded by your self-righteous friends how your eating habits are ruining the planet.

Ailments like Cancer in kidneys remain undetected if it is not diagnosed by viagra canada mastercard ultra-modern machines. buy women viagra Regular use of Shilajit capsule energizes your reproductive organs. Many men worldwide are suffering from sexual weakness purchase tadalafil best page problem. Most of these products that you see out on the market usually will 50mg viagra sale end up having side effects can cost them a loss of the amount they spend to buy the medicine. Apparently, lack of B-12, which largely, and perhaps sadly, comes in meat, cause the brain to decrease in size.  The study says women in their seventies were most at risk.  Which may explain the proliferation of cats or at least the little tchotzkes,  the ornamental figurines and such, proudly labeled collectibles, that are strewn about the house.

I have to think of the online dating sites that specialize in vegan romantic prospects.   Like minded people thinking like minded thoughts, with likely shrinking brains.   No variety desired, not on these dating sites.  And sex with someone who devours those awful, flatulent, ozone destroying bests, well that most be unthinkable to those who register on a dating site.   Or maybe they are more practically minded, and just don’t want to bother cooking the food they really deplore.   I know that varying a menu to fit special needs is annoying at best.   Making two different meals, one for youself and one for your romantic partner has to be a major pain.   It can force you to the market for prepared foods.   It can drive you to drink.  Which can shrink your brain.

What a vicious cycle.  What a vicious web we spin.

Author: Gordon Basichis

Gordon Basichis is the Co-Founder of Corra Group, specializing in pre-employment background checks and corporate research. He has been a marketing and media executive. He is the author of the best selling Beautiful Bad Girl, The Vicki Morgan Story, a non-fiction novel that helped define exotic behavior in the late twentieth century. He has recently published The Cuban Quarter, The Blood Orange, and The Guys Who Spied for China, dealing with Chinese Espionage in the United States. He is the author of The Constant Travellers. He has been a journalist for several newspapers and is a screenwriter and producer.